Comments on: The Testament of Longinus: an Eerie Vampire Bible

By: Simon May

Simon May — Sat, 13 Jun 2009 19:25:34 +0000

Hi all. Wood here.

So yeah, I know about the Christian tradition. Which is why Longinus is a saint and everything.

I spent like five years doing a research thesis on ancient religious narratives, and a lot of the stuff in the Testament riffs on that (the Gospel of Nicodemus, by the way, ends with Jesus descending to Hell and kicking Satan’s ass. It’s amazing). The multiple-author thing is partly a reference to Biblical scholarship in certain books (Isaiah, particularly), but also to the fact that I wasn’t the only author.

A load of other stuff riffs on real world scholarly stuff, too, from the name of the editor in chief right down to the mentions of apocryphal criticism. I had fun with it.

And yeah, Ed. I am sort of pleased that you wouldn’t want to tell your mum about reading it.

By: ggodo

ggodo — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 16:55:39 +0000

Daarck, I’m fairly sure that your last statement is debated more than the bible itself. I’m still not sure what any of that means.

By: khovaros

khovaros — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 16:40:46 +0000

Ah . . .

By: Ed Grabianowski

Ed Grabianowski — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 16:38:08 +0000

Yes, although in this case, it’s presented as a modern-day translation of the original text, with footnotes and appendices and such. So it would make sense as a bound book.

By: khovaros

khovaros — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 16:24:22 +0000

PDF only would be kinda sad, however I guess you could print it out on parchment style paper and then roll it up as a scroll. After all that was what book were in Rome. Actually binding them came about much later. That’s why I kept giving you guys those handouts as scrolls.

By: Ed Grabianowski

Ed Grabianowski — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 15:57:27 +0000

My understanding is that this is a pdf-only book (which is a shame, because a lot of its strength I think lies in it existing as a physical object that players could interact with).

By: khovaros

khovaros — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 15:23:20 +0000

Yeah, that book sounds really cool . . . and right up my alley, even though I never really got into playing Vampire. The historiography sounds excellent. Having two versions of the same event that conflict makes me drool. Do you have a hard copy ed? I might have to take a look at it.

By: Daarck

Daarck — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 14:13:44 +0000

Wow, cool. Very authentic-ish. I own The Book of Nod from the old World of Darkness universe (which was the story of Cain and the creation of the Vampires). The Longinus Testament sounds like it’s written in the same vain but even more so since the Book of Nod was heavily illustrated, which added a lot of atmosphere but took away from it’s “authenticity”. The art was way to contemporary. The prose was well done and very creepy though. I’ll have to take a look at this Longinus book. How much will it cost when it comes out in print? Are there any plans for it to come out in print?

By: Ed Grabianowski

Ed Grabianowski — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 03:57:32 +0000

I double-checked, and Testament of Longinus does state both blood and water came out. Interestingly (and very fittingly in the context of this discussion), two different versions of the same scene are described. Just one of the subtle ways the authors make the book feel “biblical.” Anyway, in the first version, Longinus checks and notes that Christ still lives, Christ looks at him, Longinus stabs him, and Christ cries out.

The second version is more abbreviated, and simply states that soldiers saw Christ was dead, then one of them walked up and stabbed him.

And that is the Word of Our Fake Vampire Bible.

By: Daarck

Daarck — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 02:30:05 +0000

Yes Ed, you’re right about Longinus. I wasn’t taking about him. If it helps, I specifically Capitalized the word “Tradition” to distinguish it from the other kind of definition that tradition has, which is “custom”. There are the capital “T” traditions that are held by all Orthodox Christians (ie. The Trinity, The Bible as the word of God…etc) and then there are the lower case traditions that are not (ie. how to dress for church, legends of the Saints…etc). Jesus dying of asphyxiation is a capital “T” Tradition. To explain anymore is to take the discussion somewhere inappropriate for this site and I’ve done enough of that. Oh, and by the way, this site ROCKS!

Mordicai, yes, I understand that the blood is important, which is fine, but the Bible text says blood and water came from His side. Blood from His heart, water from His lungs. I don’t think that really messes up any vampire mythology.

ggodo, I believe it might have been a giant cyborg ZOMBIE clone of his dead mother. There’s a difference.

By: ggodo

ggodo — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 00:22:12 +0000

Yea, the point of the spear stabbing was to prove that Jesus was already dead, and I was under the impression that the spear was one hundred feet long and embedded in the moon after a boy piloting giant cyborg clone of his dead mother used it to kill an angel.

By: mordicai

mordicai — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 20:46:31 +0000

Well Daarck– to the Vampire myth, the idea that blood came out, NOT water, is important, I think– like, a drop of blood from Jesus landed on Longinus’ lips & made him a vampire.

I think.

Is the book pdf only? Shame if it is; I don’t cotton to pdfs.

By: Ed Grabianowski

Ed Grabianowski — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 20:10:02 +0000

Fair enough, but I guess my only counterpoint is…well, there are LOTS of Christian traditions, and you can probably find a dozen different Longinus stories without even trying too hard. And it’s pretty conclusive that they’re all works of fiction themselves, since Longinus himself is only ever mentioned in passing, and in an apocryphal text at that. Everything about him was made up an embellished centuries after the fact.

These entwining spirals of fictions based on fictions sure can get confusing. Christianity needs a good editor!

By: Daarck

Daarck — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 20:03:10 +0000

Just a small correction.

The only time I’ve ever heard that Longinus killed Jesus was when I watched the movie Constantine staring Keanu Reeves. Historically, it has always been believed by Christians that Christ died on the cross of asphyxiation BEFORE Longinus stabbed him. This is shown by the fact that blood and water poured out of the wound. A detail only found in Luke’s Gospel. Luke, being a doctor, seems to be making sure that the detail that Christ died of asphyxiation was clear.

Is it important to know that to enjoy The Testament of Longinus? No, and I’m sure it’s a heck of a fun read, but ever since I saw the movie Constantine, it kinda bugs me when people get that detail wrong. Yes, the movie and this book are works of fiction so it’s no big deal. Just as long as you know what the actual Christian Tradition says about the subject.