I haven’t done a Crash Test Magic in ages, but I had an odd idea for a new card that I wanted to try out. I’ve been trying to figure out a way to do Voltron in Magic card form forever, and the Soulbond mechanic in Avacyn Restored indirectly inspired me to give it another try.
The idea, of course, is that all your creatures combine to form one mega creature. Mechanically, you get rid of all your creatures and replace them with a giant token creature. I’d thought of doing it as an enchantment that said something like, “Opponents must block your attacking creatures as if they were one creature with power and toughness equal to the power and toughness of all your creatures combined, and they have Trample.” You can see that that’s just a huge mess.
This is still kind of a complicated card. The “return all your exiled guys when it leaves” clause is there so you don’t get blown out of the water because your opponent has a Terminate (and it specifically says “leaves the battlefield” instead of “dies” so that a Path to Exile isn’t similarly crushing). It does let you play some interesting games with it, though, like using it to combine a Masked Admirers, an Elvish Visionary, a Kitchen Finks with a -1/-1 counter on it, and an Acidic Slime. Then sacrifice it with Greater Good. You’d end up drawing ten cards, gaining two life, resetting your Finks, plus destroying some of your opponent’s stuff.
In kicking this idea around with my brother, he suggested the risk-free nature of the card made the casting cost too low. It could work at GG4. I think it’s a slow enough card (the giant doesn’t have haste) and a terrible enough topdeck (if you have zero or one creature out, it does nothing) that a combined casting cost of 5 works, but it needs testing. Another option would be to remove the return to play clause and just give the giant Hexproof. That way your opponent can still blow it up, but it’s more challenging. Sweepers like Wrath of God will clear her creatures, too. Powder Keg and Pernicious Deed still have the potential to ruin your day, though.